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> Dear Penguin and Cricket - August 2003
Dear Penguin and Cricket - August 2003
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
I have been in a relationship with someone for a little over 6 months. I care a lot
about this person, but he knows that I am not willing to be sexual with him, and
he totally respects that. Recently there have been a lot of rumors going around about
the two of us and that we have done it. These rumors are lies. My friends believe the
rumors and they think less of me now. I feel depressed all the time because I am
losing my friends left and right. They all ignore me like I am some kind of whore
or something when its not even true.
I live in a small town and things travel fast, so I hear people talking about me all
the time. The only person I have left is my boyfriend. He has been wonderful and
is there for me all the time, and so comforting, but I want my friends back. What
should I do?
Rumors in Raleigh
Rumors in Raleigh
Dear Rumors,
I think you should one tell your friends that nothing happen and it all was a lie.... But I think If they are gonna turn
on you for something stupid like that I dont think they are really true friends.. Talk to your boyfriend about see
what he thinks you should do.. I hope this helps
Cricket
Dear Rumors,
I think you should tell your friends that nothing happened. If they don’t believe you, they were probably never
your friends. You can't make someone believe something that they don’t want to believe. If they think poorly of
you, it is because they never knew you. Cheer up and find some real friends. I know that’s easier said than
done but I have faith that you can do it.
Penguin
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
In any relationship i am pressured to go farther than kissing but now it seems that i don't even want to do
that because im afraid it will go farther. I think i don't want to because im so self conscious about the size
of my breasts. i am so incredibly flat it isn't even funny. So i wear a padded bra and all of that crap, and im
afraid if any guy finds out not only will everyone know and i will be totally humiliated but that no one else
will like me. I feel like im cheating my boyfriends out of something. So consequently i stay away from guys
and a lot of my old guy friends don't know what is wrong. What should i do???
Confused
Dear Confused,
Well I think If all these guys like you enough they wont care about your breast size and well If thats all the
guys want they are all losers and you need to find someone else who treats you better.
Cricket
Dear Confused,
You can't change who you are for anyone. You probably aren't old enough to be going further anyway but
don’t pretend to be something you aren't. If your boyfriend doesn't like you the way you are, then you need
to find someone who does. Beauty fades on the outside as years go by and if beauty or breast size is all he
likes, then what will you have later?
Penguin
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
I'm with this new guy and I like him a lot. We've been going out almost 2 months. How far should we go at
this stage? My last boyfriend and I were super close, so we went farther, faster. I think this makes my present
guy feel uncomfortable because we've been going out longer but haven't done as much. How far should
I go? How do I make him see that it doesn't matter how fast I took my last relationship, it's just this one that counts??
Boyfriend Problem
Dear Boyfriend Problem,
Well I think you shouldnt go TOO fast I mean dont give him more than you think you should. I mean 2 months
isn't a very long time.. You need to talk to him about it and if he cares about you he will talk to you and tell you
what he wants and if thats to much for you tell him.. hope this helps
Cricket
Dear Boyfriend Problem,
What you did with one boy has nothing to do with another. Tell him you will only do what you are comfortable
with and if he doesn’t like it, then he doesn’t' care about you very much and he certainly doesn’t respect you.
Penguin
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
I am going with a girl who is very special to me. I can say with confidence that I love her. I really REALLY
want to kiss her, but I've never really kissed a girl (I'm not talking about a peck--I mean a real kiss) I want it
to be special, but I don't know how. Are there instructions? Is there a "specific way"? How will I know when
the right time is? Please help!
Dear Kisser,
I think you should just go with the flow everyone knows how to kiss Its not hard I mean its something that you
are born with.. Well if you want some tips on how to kiss go to google.com or Ask jeeves.com then type in
kissing tips or something related to that.. Well I hope I help.
Cricket
Dear Kisser,
Don’t worry so much about it. Just go with your feelings. It will come naturally.
Penguin
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
MY boyfriend is a "sloppy" kisser. We will be making out and when we "break" my face is wet
and slobbery. Is this normal? If not, should I tell him? How? Could it be me? Thanx alot!
Kissing Confused
Dear Kissing Confused,
Yea its normal but if you don’t like it change it I mean change it. Teach him another way but don’t come
straight out and tell him cuz guys have a big EGO and well if ya break it they wont be to happy.. Hope this helps
Cricket
Dear Kissing Confused,
That is a question that is difficult to answer. There is no such thing as a bad kiss, but unfortunately, there are bad
kissers. Every kiss is different, every message personal. There are as many different kisses as there are messages
one wants to convey.
Penguin
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
What is the difference between a crush, liking someone, and being in love with somebody? I think I might
know, but I'm not absolutely sure. Thank you very much!!!!
Crush or Love
Dear Crush or Love,
A crush is you haven’t known the person a long time and well you like what you see... In love is when you
have known the person and you like everything about him/her.. It takes a little while to fall in love but it will
happen a lot in your life.
Cricket
Dear Crush or Love,
A crush is the love between young couples within a few weeks of getting together. Not really true love, more
blind affection. When you feel really attracted to someone, in fact, infatuated with the person, and have strong
romantic interest in her/him, it is called a crush. Love is…the commitment of ones will to someone else’s needs
and best interests regardless of the cost.
Penguin
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
I went to the beach this summer and I was walking on the beach at night and I met 3 guys who were semi-drunk.
They asked me and my friend how old we were and since I'm only 13 I felt like I had to say I was older even
though I act older to, so it didn't seem obvious when I blurted out I was 14. I didn't know at the time that this
people I would be hanging out with the rest of my vacation and even when I got home I still communicate
with one of them. He is 16 and he lives in another state and he's coming to visit in a month when he turns 17.
I don't know what to do because he is coming and if we become better friends he might find out my real age.
I don't want us to break apart because of this. I can hide it but I don't know when it would be right to tell him.
Wrong Age
Dear Age,
Well I think you should of told him your real age in the first place but since you didn’t its pretty hard to tell him
and then him not getting mad. I mean hes coming to see you and he likes you and well you have to tell him
sometime because if he finds out on his own your going to be in a DEEP hole. If he asks again tell him the
truth. Telling the truth is SO much better than lying because it will always come back and hit you in the face..
I hope this helps
Cricket
Dear Age,
Fess up before its too late. True friendships and anything bigger rely on and are built on honesty.
Penguin
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
There is a guy that I really like and i think he likes me. Whenever he is around his friends or my friends,
he gets really nervous and embarrassed. He will barely speak to me. When we are alone, he is totally
open and relaxed. I was thinking of asking him to come over. Would this be a good idea?
Embarrassed
Dear Embarrassed,
Well if you want him to come over go ahead
Cricket
Dear Embarrassed,
Go ahead and invite him over. Maybe if you spend more time together, he will get more comfortable around you.
Penguin
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
Where is the best place for a single female like me to find an available male? Also, what do you think about
meeting someone on the Internet, is it safe and is it "normal?"
Looking
Dear Looking,
How about the mall or the movies or some friends?
Cricket
Dear Looking,
Try church, school and other friends.
Penguin
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
My friend is such a flirt especially when she's online. She is always telling these guys online that she loves
them. Then she gets her self into these big messes with all these guys about who she loves more. So, of
course she asks me for help with her problems...She even e-mailed me and asked me what she should do
with these guys now?????" I am tired of trying to help her when she's the one that keeps messing up like that.
Now she even wants me to go with her to meet this other kid that she talks to. I know I am not jealous of her
because I have my own boyfriend. What do I do?
Friend Problem
Dear Friend Problem,
Do not let your friend go to meet this person. If she insists, tell a parent. There are safety rules all over
WiredKids to help her learn how to be safe.
Cricket
Dear Friend Problem,
DO NOT LET HER GO meet that guy for all she knows he could be in his 80s. There are some VERY
VERY bad people out there. Here’s a story that happen to one of my friends. She went to the movies with
some guy she met off the Internet and well she failed to return for about a week or so. Well she showed back
up with cuts and bruises. No one knows what happen to her because she won’t tell anyone but she is VERY
lucky to be alive. Don’t let that happen to your friend. With the boyfriend thing with her loving people try to
find her a real boyfriend who loves her for her not for what she says over the internet.. Maybe you and her and
your boyfriend can all go to a movie together and maybe your boyfriend can find her one. Hope this helps
Penguin
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
Well, I'm dating this guy on the Internet and we've said I Love You to one another. We're also supposed
to meet and I have no clue as to what to do, can you help?
Meeting
Dear Meeting,
DO NOT GO meet that guy. There are some VERY VERY bad people out there. Here’s a story that happen
to one of my friends. She went to the movies with some guy she met off the Internet and well she failed to return for
about a week or so. Well she showed back up with cuts a bruises. No one knows what happen to her because
she won’t tell anyone but she is VERY lucky to be alive. Don’t do that to yourself, friends, or your family.
Cricket
Dear Meeting,
Never meet anyone you don’t know from the Internet. Its not safe and there are some bad people out there.
Penguin
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
How do I break off an 3-year friendship? She lies about things and is always making sarcastic remarks about
my family. I think it's a self-esteem problem. I have tried to be a good friend but this friendship puts me on a
roller coaster. How do I break this friendship off? I can't just say, "I don't want to be your friend anymore."
Do you think it'll work if I just try to avoid her? Thanks for you time!
I don't want to be friends
Dear I don't want to be friends,
I guess if you really don’t want to hang out with her try to avoid her if that doesn’t work you will just have to
deal with it or tell her straight out.
Cricket
Dear I don't want to be friends,
If she really is your friend, you need to tell her how she makes you feel. Give her a chance. She
might be teasing and think you understand that. Worse case is she gets mad and then you don’t
have a problem anymore.
Penguin
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
I have a group or six or seven really great friends that I've been friends with for along time. The problem is,
a few of them are getting a little too fast for me. They keep talking about how drinking isn't such a bad thing,
and they'll probably will start smoking, etc. I always say that I won't do any of that in high school and probably
very little in college. They say how silly that is, and how "everyone" drinks and smokes and has sex in high
school. I'm really worried about it. I can just picture myself at some party with my friends all smoking and
drinking, and me being really left out. I really like all my friends, and I would never want new ones to replace
them, but I don't know what I'll do.
Drinking Friends
Dear Drinking Friends,
Well just say no That’s all you have to do.. I know that’s not easy but I mean if you feel to pressured find
some new friends to hang out with until they stop doing all those things
Cricket
Dear Drinking Friends,
Cricket said it better than I could.
Penguin
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
I have this problem with my best friend whom I've been very close to for 3½ years now. I asked her if that
was her holding my ex's hand after school the night we have a meeting and she said that she was hanging out
with friends. A friend saw her again holding his hand. I won't be mad if she is going with him, it is just the
fact that she lied to me. So should I go and ask her again if she was holding his hand and also going with
him if so. Because I am totally upset right about now.
Dear Ex boyfriend problems,
Well I think you should just leave it alone because eventually YOU will see her doing that. I think she will
tell you eventually you just have to give her time I. She’s probably scared to tell you
Cricket
Dear Ex boyfriend problems,
I understand you being hurt that your friend might have lied to you but the bottom line is, its not your
business. If you didn’t see it yourself, the other friends could be lying as well. Just let it go and don’t
worry about it and never accuse someone of lying unless you know for sure.
Penguin
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
My friend is so depressed. She has no self-esteem, and is always complaining about how
ugly she is or how she's never had a boyfriend because she can't get anyone or whatever. She's really
a great person, but she's always so negative. She's never talked about suicide or drug use or anything
too drastic, but I still worry about her. I always tell her that she's not ugly (and I'm telling the truth when
I say she's pretty) but she never believes me! She thinks the world hates her, and it's really sad.
What can I do to help?
Low Self Esteem friend
Dear Low Self Esteem friend,
Try to talk to her or find some guys that like her and get them to talk to her... I have a friend just like that
and that’s what I did and her self-esteem is ALOT higher now. Hope this helps.
Cricket
Dear Low Self Esteem friend,
Low self-esteem is a complex problem and difficult, though not impossible, to overcome. Try to help
her to stop comparing herself with others. Surround her with positive, supportive people and get her
involved in something she enjoys.
Penguin
Dear Cricket & Penguin,
I have a real temper problem. When something happens and it makes me mad, I just go off on everyone.
I really hate being temperamental because it makes me say things I don't mean. Then later i end up regretting
them. What can i do to control my temper?
Hot Tempered Boy
Dear Hot Tempered Boy,
I think you need to find something to entertain you when your mad or something to blow off steam.. When I am
mad I go on a walk and so on and so forth. Find something you love and when you get mad, go do that to go
blow off the steam instead of yelling at friends and family and regretting it.
Cricket
Dear Hot Tempered Boy,
Find something that relaxes you (music, skateboarding, drawing, etc.) and do it regularly. If you've got a
problem with someone, don't hold it inside, let him/her know about it.
Penguin
